When Nnamdi Kanu arrived at the European Parliament in 2019, he essentially delivered a TED Talk titled: “Nigeria: How Not to Run a Country.” If the EU expected diplomatic niceties, Kanu came with PowerPoint slides of wahala.
1. Nigeria Is in Crisis — Shocking, Right?
Kanu began by informing Europeans of something Nigerians already know deep in their bones: Nigeria is a permanent emergency with a flag. According to him, the country governs with all the coordination of a football team that forgot the ball at home.
2. Biafrans: The Official Scapegoats Since 1960
He reminded his audience that whenever Nigeria sneezes, Biafrans catch pneumonia.
Electricity fails? Blame Biafra.
Fuel scarcity? Blame Biafra.
Traffic in Lagos? Still Biafra.
He walked them through the history: massacres, civil war, repression, and the ongoing hobby of arresting people for wearing IPOB-branded handkerchiefs.
3. The Fulani Herders Problem — Nationwide Trekking With Benefits
He explained the land conflict: Fulani herders are marching south like it’s a sponsored marathon, and the government’s solution is RUGA — a programme that sounds like the name of a Nigerian wrestling move.
According to Kanu, RUGA is either:
- an agricultural plan, or
- a subtle attempt to colonise Biafran farmland with cows holding residency permits.
Either way, Biafran farmers are not amused.
4. Nigeria: A Colonial Experiment Gone Wrong
Kanu told the EU that Nigeria was created by Britain the same way children combine random Lego pieces and call it a spaceship.
According to him, the country never worked — not in 1914, not in 1967, and definitely not in 2019.
He described Nigeria as “a failed state”, which is the polite academic way of saying “this engine has knocked.”
5. IPOB: The Peaceful Protesters With Loud Voices
To calm any EU fears, he clarified that IPOB is:
- pro-referendum
- anti-violence
- and very pro-staying-at-home on May 30th
(Which makes IPOB the only group in Nigeria that can successfully shut down an entire region without even being in government.)
6. The Grand Conclusion
Kanu basically told Europe:
“If you want peace in Africa, start by untying the Nigerian knot Britain tied with palm wine and guesswork.”
In short, give Biafra a referendum, and the continent might finally stop vibrating like a generator with bad fuel.
Centre for Nigeria Progress 