Ladies and gentlemen, gather round. Trump’s USA has made a request so ambitious, so cosmically bold, that even NASA had to put down its coffee and ask, “Wait… what now?”
According to the mood music coming out of Washington, the United States—under its current Trumpian remix—would like the world to stop spinning so that it can step off. And quite frankly, the rest of the world may be ready to hold the brakes and say, “Please, don’t let the door hit you on the way out.”
The Trumpian Ego Orbit
Trump and his loyal choir believe they orbit the sun at a more elevated latitude than the rest of humanity. It’s the kind of exaggerated self-opinion that would make even Zeus raise an eyebrow.
For decades, America built systems that conveniently tilted the global chessboard in its favour. Now that other players have learned the rules and—God forbid—started winning a few games, the Trump crowd insists the chessboard is rigged.
The attitude is simple:
If the system works for us, it’s democracy.
If it works for anyone else, it’s a threat.
Impatience With the “Unworthy”
From Gaza to Ukraine to Nigeria, Trump’s America—judging by its tone and posture—no longer hides its irritation at the existence of people it does not consider within its assumed superiority orbit.
When Trumpists say “the world,” they really mean:
A place full of annoying countries
populated by annoying people
doing annoying things
like having opinions.
Suddenly, the same America that once lectured the world on human rights now performs interpretive gymnastics to defend whichever state acts most like a rogue cousin at a family reunion. Whether it’s Russia playing imperial landlord or Israel waging a catastrophic campaign in Gaza, Trump’s bloc finds a way to clasp its hands behind its back and say, “Well, you know… things happen.”
Trying to Start a Religious Musical Chairs in Nigeria
Trump’s gang also appears keen on exporting one of its favourite political toys: the “False Dichotomy Generator™.”
In the U.S., it’s “Christians vs. Everyone Else.”
Now they want to try it in Nigeria—a country where the religious lines look more like spaghetti than straight borders. Trying to force a neat Christian/Muslim divide on Nigeria is like trying to fold a live cat into a suitcase. Loud. Messy. And doomed.
The Ghost of Munich is Hovering
Right now, the global mood feels like Neville Chamberlain rehearsing his lines:
“Peace in our time,”
waving a paper so flimsy you could use it as transparent tracing sheet.
Except this time, the paper reads: “Agreement with Trump—valid until he wakes up tomorrow.”
Like the 1930s, every concession seems to encourage a return trip for more.
And more.
And even more.
He’s like a customer who takes advantage of “unlimited refills” with a 50-gallon drum.
Fortunately, the Sun is a Ruthless Democrat
But fear not. Time has a perfect voting record—100% turnover rate for problematic leaders.
The sun set on Hitler.
It will set on Trump too.
It always does.
No man, no empire, no orange-tinted personality cult is powerful enough to stop celestial mechanics.
Midterms: A Tiny Flashlight in the Darkness
The world may not be able to stop spinning just yet, but the U.S. midterms offer one precious thing:
A chance for America to put the brakes on Trump’s runaway cosmic bus before it crashes into the rest of us.
If enough Americans decide they prefer a functioning reality to an unstable orbit, then maybe—just maybe—we can keep this world spinning without having to throw anyone off.
Until then, everyone buckle up.
Trump’s America wants to step off the planet—
and the rest of us are just trying to make sure it doesn’t push us off with it.
Centre for Nigeria Progress 