Nigerian Judiciary by the Truckload By Pius Adesanmi

I have very long legs in the Nigerian judiciary. If you are a Judge of any consequence, including at least one current Judge on the Supreme Court, there is a good chance that I know you and we have had nkwobi together. That I know you is not the issue. The issue is how we …

British Ambassador Concealed Insults from Trump by Writing Messages in English by Andy Borowitz

LONDON (The Borowitz Report)—The British Ambassador to the United States, Kim Darroch, explained on Monday that he had tried to conceal insulting remarks from Donald Trump by writing his cables in English. “I believed that, by writing these messages in English, that would serve the same purpose as encryption,” Darroch said. “The fact that Trump …

Judicial power curbs personal choice, Sumption RICHARD ANSETT/BBC claims

The former judge said that “we are afraid to let people be guided by their own moral judgments” An explosion of new laws and judicial power has diminished the ability of people to take their own decisions, a former Supreme Court judge has said. Jonathan Sumption, QC, 70, who retired from the UK’s top court …

U.K. Unable to Find Replacement Ambassador Who Does Not Think Trump Is an Idiot by Andy Borowitz

LONDON (The Borowitz Report)—Following the resignation of its Ambassador to the United States, Kim Darroch, the government of the United Kingdom has disclosed that it has been unable to find a replacement for Darroch who does not also think that Donald J. Trump is a blithering idiot. At a press conference at 10 Downing Street, …

WhatsApp deportation By James Wood

British marketing manager, 24, visiting girlfriend, 23, in Chicago is locked up for 24 hours, deported then banned from US for life after immigration officials scour his phone and find month-old text saying ‘I am moving to be with you’ • Isaac Roblett, 24, from Hastings, East Sussex flew to Chicago in US on April 24 • …