There are many ways to celebrate the International Day of Persons with Disabilities. Some countries showcase policy reforms. Others highlight accessibility innovations. But in Nigeria—ah, Nigeria—we always find the express lane to absurdity, overtake common sense on the bend, and park comfortably in Season 1, Episode 1 of “Government: The Reality Show.”
In Edo State, under the distinguished office of the First Lady (a woman who seems to think governance is a cross between Big Brother Naija and Oprah’s Favorite Things), the day was marked not by policy, not by inclusion, not by legislation—no, that would be too normal. Instead, they opted to throw crumbs at the disabled like pigeons in the palace courtyard.
And not metaphorical crumbs—actual, camera-ready, PR-certified crumbs.
Journalists were invited, not to report on reforms, but to document the thrilling moment someone received a bag of rice and a motivational pat on the head. The disabled community, who should have been the focus, suddenly found themselves unwitting contestants on “Keeping Up With the State House.”
But wait—Nigeria is the land of plot twists.
Before the rice even settled in its sacks, government loyalists—hale, hearty, gym-fit, with kneecaps that have never betrayed them—began creeping into the line to “share in the blessings.” Because in Nigeria, poverty does not discriminate, but opportunism is an Olympic sport.
Naturally, the actual disabled participants were furious. Imagine being deprived in daily life, deprived in government planning, and then deprived again in the crumb distribution meant for you? That’s not misfortune—that’s a government-sponsored customer service failure.
A fracas erupted. Wheelchairs shifted into gear. Crutches were raised in righteous indignation. And in the middle of all this, a government henchman, Kelly Okungbowa A.K.A Ebo Stone who must have missed anger management classes due to “logistics”—slapped a local journalist, EBS Reporter Juliet Enabulele.
You would think, given the context, he would slap injustice, or slap mismanagement into order. But no—he aimed for the journalist. Why? Because in Nigeria, if anything goes wrong, a journalist is always within slapping distance.
By the end, disabled and abled Nigerians alike were united—not by inclusion policies, not by economic empowerment, but by equal opportunity humiliation from the very people meant to govern them.
And that is the greatest irony:
In a country overflowing with resources and potential, both the disabled and abled are victims of a government that believes governance means distributing rice with a media crew present.
As for the International Day for Persons with Disabilities?
Well, in Edo State, it served as a powerful reminder that Nigerian leaders can turn even a globally recognised day of dignity into a carnival of chaos.
But look on the bright side—
At least they didn’t charge gate fees for the reality show.
Yet.
Centre for Nigeria Progress 